Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Matt Hardy Is The Biggest Douche Bag Ever

For real. I am not joking.

I used to be a pretty big fan of Matt Hardy until the whole Lita, Edge cry babyfest went down. Before I get into any of this, if you are not a wrestling fan, prepare to be confused.

Matt Hardy in real life, was dating fellow wrestler Lita, and was best friends with fellow wrestler, Edge. Well in real life, Edge and Lita were screwing around behind Matt Hardys back. Well he found out, went and blogged about it like a huge girl, and got fired from WWE for it.

Anyways, he has since been hired back and on Sunday started what seemed to be one of the most awesome angles in wrestling history. Until yesterday.

See, we all know wrestling is fake. We know it is all entertainment, but do we need wrestlers also telling us it's fake? No.

See one problem is a good majority of Matt Hardy fans, about 85% of them, are middle aged single overweight mothers of 2 or 3. Seriously, no joke, go look at all the comments on Matt Hardys MySpace page.

Now, Sunday, Matt Hardy turned on his brother Jeff Hardy, hit Jeff with a chair, causing Jeff to lose his championship. And Matt Hardy fans went CRAZY. Posting hundreds of messages on his MySpace yelling at him and calling him names, cause see, they think this shit is still real. Well for some insane reason, Matt Hardy replied to them with this message....

OK IAM GOING TO SAY THIS ONLY ONCE
Today at 8:32pm
IT IS PART OF THE STORYLINE I LOVE JEFF I WOULD NEVER HURT HIM THIS IS MY JOB IF I DO NOT DO WHAT IAM TOLD TO DO THEN I CAN GET IN BIG SHIT SO CALL ME MEAN CALL ME A BITCH CALL ME WAHT EVERY ELS NAMES YOU HAVE FOR ME I DONT CARE I KNOW I IT WAS FOR MY JOB AND I THANK ALL THE PEOPLE WHO UNDERSTAND THAT BUT IF YOU TAKE IT TO FAR YOU WILL BE DELETED OFF MY FRIENDS LIST

Wow.

So basically, Matt Hardy cares more about what his MySpace friends think, over the magic of storylines in wrestling. I do believe that if this was 1988, and Matt Hardy said something like this, he would in fact be dead. Imagine this.....

First watch this video....



Now, the next day Andre The Giant sends this letter out.

Dear Fans Of The Wrestlemania!

I know you are all upset, but listen, this is only a storyline. It is not real. I love the Hulkster, he is my best friend. In fact, I love him so much that at the Wrestlemania, I am going to let him bodyslam me! So relax everyone, I don't really hate Hulkster.

Love,
Andre


..................

Fucking Matt Hardy needs to stop worrying what fat 35 year old single women think about him. Bischoff was right all along.

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