Tuesday, March 31, 2009

My Plans On October 2nd Are Officially Booked! Toy Story 1 and Toy Story 2 Double Feature in 3D!!!!!!!!!!!

As you know, in an earlier blog I am too lazy to look up, the release of Toy Story in 3D is my most anticipated movie of 2009. And now comes word that on October 2nd, Toy Story and Toy Story 2 will be billed as a double feature and presented in the all new Disney 3D. Take a look below for the official word from Walt Disney Studios.

Moviegoers are in for twice the fun and triple the thrills as The Walt Disney Studios prepares to debut the Disney Digital 3D(TM) versions of Disney-Pixar's beloved animated features - "Toy Story" and "Toy Story 2" - during a special limited engagement starting on October 2, 2009, it was announced today by Mark Zoradi, president, Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures Group.

This extraordinary double feature, taking the latest advances in digital 3D technology "to infinity and beyond," will play exclusively in 3D. "Toy Story," the industry's first ever computer-animated feature and the first feature released by Pixar Animation Studios in 1995, and "Toy Story 2," the critically acclaimed sequel that debuted in 1999, were both directed by Academy Award®-winning filmmaker John Lasseter. Both films have been meticulously re-rendered in 3D from the original digital files using the latest state-of-the-art technology.

Commenting on the announcement, Zoradi said, "This fantastic double feature will let moviegoers see two of their all-time favorite films from Pixar Animation Studios in a way that they've never seen them before, and all for the price of one movie ticket. John Lasseter and the animation team have truly created a spectacular 3D experience with Buzz, Woody, and all the toy characters in a whole new eye-popping dimension. We're also excited that audiences will soon see a whole new chapter when Toy Story 3 in 3D, directed by Lee Unkrich (co-director of Toy Story 2) comes to theaters on June 18, 2010."

Lasseter added, "The 'Toy Story' films and characters will always hold a very special place in our hearts and we're so excited to be bringing these first two films back for audiences to enjoy in a whole new way thanks to the latest in 3D technology. Disney Digital 3D offers lots of great new possibilities for the art of animation and we will continue to use this new technology to push the boundaries in telling our stories. With 'Toy Story 3' shaping up to be another great adventure for Buzz, Woody and the gang from Andy's room, we thought this would be the perfect way to let audiences experience the first two films all over again. To see the movies back to back will be an amazing treat as well. This is certainly nostalgic for me and reminiscent of my youth when double features were the norm."

Originally released by Walt Disney Pictures in 1995, "Toy Story" went on to receive Oscar® nominations for Original Screenplay, Original Score, and Original Song earning Lasseter a Special Achievement Award "for his inspired leadership of the Pixar 'Toy Story' Team, resulting in the first feature-length computer-animated film." 'Toy Story 2' was released in 1999, and reunited voice talents Tom Hanks and Tim Allen, in their roles as Woody and Buzz. The film became one of the most popular animated features of all time, and received an Academy Award® nomination for Original Song.


Random Villains Babe Of The Week: Alyson Hannigan

Back in the glory days, also known as, my high school years. I was, like I am today, a bit of a nerd. I loved me some god damn Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Sarah Michelle Gellar was as hot as can be, so was the likes of Charisma Carpenter, Eliza Dushku, Emma Caulfield, Juliet Landau, Mercedes McNab and Clare Kramer, but not many mentioned the unsung hotness of that show. Miss Alyson Hannigan. Along with Buffy she also starred in American Pie 1 2 and 3 with Shannon Elizabeth. And is currently on the show How I Met Your Mother. Which I wish I had started watching when it first started.

Anyways. Enough talk. Just look.





Also check out:
Alyson Hannigan bio, nudity review, pics and clips at MrSkin.com
Sarah Michelle Gellar Topless in Maxim

Monday, March 30, 2009

Blogging from the Blackberry Curve

So I am posting this from the Blackberry Curve. It is pretty simple to do and set up. Now if something crazy happens or I get bored I can do up some articles for you fine folks. And as you can see you can even post pictures saved on your phone to the site. To set this lil feature up just go to your settings then Email and make the secret lil word in there and just email your blogs to that address. Done deal.

Random Villain Hates! #2

You know what else I hate? These people...

"Well the economy is so bad right now."

Shut, the fuck, up. Please.

Everyone having money problems and blaming it on the economy is so full of shit it makes me wanna punch someone. Those people are also the ones spending all their money on pointless bullshit instead of what they NEED.

I dropped out of high school.

Never got my GED.

Never went to college.

I have a wife, a newborn baby, a new car, and a house. And I am doing just fine. Why? Because I am not an idiot. Bills and other needs like groceries and diapers and such come FIRST. Then I save a little and spend some on luxury like games or whatever. Not the other way around like these cry babies do. I am doing better than the guys I grew up with who DID graduate and went to college.

Stop being stupid. Spend money wisely.

Random Villain Hates!

Enough of this bullshit. Devon tellin people the gay crap that he likes that no one gives two toots about. Here is some bullshit that I currently hate.

1. Gay blogs about shit that someone likes.

2. 24. Fuck that show. The only way to enjoy that god damn show is to view it as if you were watching a Sci Fi channel show because NOTHING on that show could logically happen in real life. Jack Bauer has saved the country about 6 times now yet they are STILL pissed at him for torturing terrorists? Retarded. Whatever.

3. Diets. Fuck diets give me a McRib please. Thanks.

4. Working. I remember back in the 4th grade I begged my mom for a drum set so I could learn drums and instead she gives me a clarinet. WTF. I could be a rock star right now making crazy money bangin on god damn drums all day. And instead my mom gives me a piece of shit clarinet that I learned Hot Cross Buns on and that was that. Stupid bullshit.

5. People that bitch about police using force on criminals. Fuck you idiots. 4 cops died last week because they were NOT agressive. The fact is simple. If you do not want to get your ass kicked by a cop, then don't break the law. I think if you break the law and then try to run from the cops or do some stupid high speed chase bullshit they should have the right to KILL YOU. Yeah, if cops could use lethal force at will, I bet you anything that crimes would drop. I wouldn't wanna go rob a liqour store and score 100 bucks if I knew that cops could just come in and kill me if they wanted to. So if you got a problem with aggresive cops out there that kick ass like it ain't shit and you wanna bitch about it, I have a quote the great Samuel L Jackson for you, the next time your ass is gettin mugged by a guy with a gun, we will go find you some nice cops to handle it.

6. Obama haters. God damn people are retarded. "Obama promised change but what has changed!?? Huh??! Nothing!!" Shut the fuck up sugar britches. Obama has been in office a whole what, 2 months? Shit takes time. And hes busy cleaning up the fucking clusterfuck that Bush left behind.

7. Phoenix Arizona. Fuck this place. God damn I am so sick of it. Weather is miserable. People always sayin OH MAN ITS NOTHIN BUT SUNSHINE ITS GREAT! Fuck you, you live in 120 degree heat. Fuck having 80 degree Christmas morning. That shit is bullfuck. Who the hell wants to be sweating and shit on Christmas? Not me. Book me a ticket out of this hellhole please.

8. Being hungry. I fuckin hate being hungry so I am gonna stop writing this shit and go make me this crazy sandwich shit that I got.

Verizon Blackberry Curve 8330 Review

I have a strange obsession with electronics. Yeah, I am one of THOSE guys. When some new gadget comes out I must own it. So any time Verizon came out with a new handy looking phone, I had to own it, badly. So when LG came out with the V, I got it the first day, the Voyager was soon to follow, but I had so many problems with the Voyager that finally Verizon said fine here is the LG Dare, which was a huge improvement over the Voyager, but I found myself sick of the "touch screen" crap. It was a nice novelty at first, but meh. Done with it.

So along came the Buy one get one free Blackberry phone deal. And my wife was longing for the curve. And I figured it was time to step into the Blackberry world. And step in I did. The old saying is true, once you go black, you don't go back. This phone is so handy and fantastic that I do not see myself ever going back to any other type of phone. I am Blackberry for life.

What does this phone do? Well damn near anything I need it to do. I am not a big bad business man so I have no use for all the corporate email and tasks and such that it can set up for me. I am a casual phone user. Just the basics. So for me, it has what I need. I got my email linked up to the phone. I got AIM set up. I even got the Blackberry messenger which is very useful. No need to go through the contact list and find my wife and select Send Text Message. Now I just open up the Blackberry Messenger application, and there she is. I can customize the icons where I want and where I want them to be. Hell I can even set it up so the phone will turn on and off by itself when I want it to. The sound of people on the other line is so much better than the LG phones I used, and from what I was told people can hear my better too.

On top of all else the best news is that this Wednesday, Blackberry will launch the Blackberry App Store. Which will provide Blackberry users with all kinds of tools and games and strange fart noise machines that the iPhone users get.

In May, Blackberry is releasing the Curve 8990. But from looking at the specifications, the only thing I see that is REALLY upgraded is a better camera. My dare had a 3.2 mega pixel camera, and this Curve I have now is only 2.0. And I can't tell any difference. Also the new Curve will sport WiFi. But with Verizon you have the unlimited data plan. So you don't really need WiFi since you can get on the internet when you want and stay on as long as you want. So I think I will be sticking with the Curve 8330 for a long long time. Especially if this App Store has some awesome tools in it.

In closing I will simply say, if you do not have a Blackberry, and you are an avid user of a cell phone, then you are wasting your time with the LG crap that is out now. Join us.

For more info on the Blackberry Curve 8330, see Verizon Wireless:



Sunday, March 29, 2009

Devon Lohan Likes! #2

This week I have a variety of likes, ranging from TV shows, to albums, to even iphone applications. Last week's entry brought on a few comments, maybe we can get a little more this week? Unless you're Theresa. In which case, fuck off as usual.

  1. Dollhouse. - If you haven't checked out the latest FOX series from mastermind Joss Whedon, then you are definitely missing out. I've been a big fan of all of Joss's previous shows, i.e. Buffy, Angel, Firefly, and Wonderfalls. I'm not the biggest fan of Eliza Dushku's acting, but she's definitely no eye sore. Olivia Williams is the villainous boss, and the dude who played Obama on Little Britain USA is constantly kicking ass. It feels a little like Alias, but that's not a bad thing. It has all the great spy vs spy action of Alias, with the campy cheese of the Buffyverse.
  2. "The Seldom Seen Kid" by Elbow - The fourth album from the award winning British alternative rock band. Saw these guys on Glastonbury Live '08, on my HD Palladia channel (which you should check out if you have it in HD) and really liked the sound. According to Wikipedia, the band only has 5 regular members, but when they play they have a mini orchestra, so there's actually like 15 or more people on stage. This album is really good, if you like Brit rock.
  3. Restaurants (iphone app) - this application shows you just about every major fast food restaurant, and their complete menus - but the real catch, and what the app is all about - is the calculator. It tells you exactly how much fat and how many calories are in each of the things you eat. A medium sized Big Mac meal has over 60 grams of fat, and 800 calories. I've been on a diet and trying to eat better, and this app has helped me to actually stay away from all the fast food. When you know just how much of that bad stuff is in it, you don't want to eat it, trust me.


Friday, March 27, 2009

You know whats gay?

Being a single guy in your 20s and having dinner parties.

Posted on Twitter by Devon this morning -

devoalmighty Bought three bottles of wine this morning around 7:30. I just couldn't decide! Dinner with friends tonight, should be exceptional!
"Thanks for dinner Devon!"


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Best Trailer Ever? Where the Wild Things Are!

I dunno if it's the amazing song by my 2nd favorite band ever Arcade Fire, or the fact that this was my absolute favorite book as a kid. But this trailer gets you in all the right spots, and should remind you how much fun going to the movies can be. I really can not wait for this movie to come out.

Where the Wild Things Are



Tuesday, March 24, 2009

PETA Joins In Protesting Call Of Duty For Animal Abuse.

Yes.

Seriously.

Some nerds at a High School in Massachusetts started a protest for the treatment of dogs in Call of Duty: World At War. And now... PETA, has joined the protest against the treatment of VIRTUAL FUCKING ANIMALS.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

Look, I know PETA is batshit crazy. But it never really bothered me. If someone is wearing a fur coat, throw poop on it, I don't care. And don't get me wrong, I am not for abusing animals in any way. I love animals. But these are VIRTUAL ANIMALS. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING REAL.

Mind you this is Call Of Duty. The newest one, just came out a few months ago. Forget the fact that for DECADES we have been killing animals in video games. Also in Call Of Duty, these are ATTACK DOGS. They are coming to kill you. Now I can remember about twenty years ago, sitting in front of my TV. Killing the fuckin SHIT out of harmless ducks for hours on end. No protest then. But why a protest now? Simple. PETA are the biggest attention whores I have ever seen in my life. They have nothing to do right now, nothing is going on, so I know! Lets protest a popular video game!! Also keep in mind there are tons of other games out there where you kill animals. Big Game Hunter anyone? No? That's right, it's not a very popular game.

So you know what, tonight, I am going to go onto Call Of Duty. And I am going to kill the ever living crap out of every dog I see on that game that is running up trying to rip my throat out. Fuck those dogs. They are done for. Does PETA also not realize in that game we are killing HUMAN BEINGS?

God damn I hate this planet. PETA, you are officially on my shit list. Welcome to hell.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Devon Lohan Likes!

I figure I need to be more active, and I can do this from my laptop at night on the couch, beer within reach. I'm gonna try out a new weekly column (history will show I've always failed at this), and just point out some things I really like at the moment. So here goes.

  1. I Love You, Man - Saw this tonight and I can't say enough good about it. Probably Paul Rudd's funniest movie to date, and definitely a big step up for Jason Segal from that Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I wish I could forget the awful date I went on to see that movie. Fuck.
  2. TV Show Finales - Big Love, Eastbound & Down, and Battlestar Galactica*. Frak, this past weekend was packed with some TV season finales, and in one case *series finale. My neighbor is watching the news on his back patio and just burped really loud. It echoed. Wtf? But anyways, all three shows put on a .... show. BSG wrapped up nicely, kind of like a cannoli. I'm sorry to see it go, but happy with how it did.
  3. http://www.344pounds.com/ - This dude is the shit. I'm following, and it's working. Seriously.
  4. My new iPod Touch. I didn't want an iPhone, because I hate AT&T service (funny all things considered) but I did want all the fun apps. So I got a touch, and it's fucking awesome. I'll probably do a whole separate post about it... so stay tuned or w/e.
  5. Pita Pit. Delicious, healthy, pitas... who could ask for more? Think Subway, but without bread that's been sitting out all day, you get a warm fresh pita. The Gyro is the best, with feta and olives. Mmmm.
  6. Heroes. Everyone is giving Heroes a lot of shit still, all these comic book indie nerds on the internet. But let me tell you something, Heroes is the fucking shit right now. Quit yer belly achin nerds, and fuck off with your Watchmen, and watch Heroes.
Yeah alright so there you go. Proceed with talking shit in the comments like a bunch of predictable cunts.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

WWE's Kane vs. UFC's Tim Sylvia... FIGHT!

First, lets get the Associated Press report out of the way:

DETROIT, MI - Former UFC Heavyweight Champion, Tim Sylvia was involved in a fight at a bar in downtown Detroit Michigan with 7 foot, 320 pound WWE Superstar, Glen 'Kane' Jacobs.No details are currently being released on how the fight started. A witness says the two were arguing and Tim Sylvia instigated the fight. Jacobs quickly took Sylvia to the ground and repeatedly punched him in the face. The bartender along with a bystander helped pull Jacobs off Sylvia. Sylvia was said to have suffered a broken nose and a black eye.The police were notified but since the fight was not prolonged and neither men wanted to press any charges, no arrests were made. Sylvia was driven by a friend who was with him to the hospital to treat the broken nose. Glen Jacobs left the scene with his wife shortly after.

Now, here's my thoughts. This needed to happen. Obviously Glen Jacobs is a goliath of a dude, but finally we can lay to rest the question of "what if a WWE guy and UFC guy got in a fight in an alley/bar/parking lot/whatever. Yeah sure, we've seen Brock Lesnar come in to the octagon and whoop some ass, but even that was MMA style fighting. It could always go either way with an armbar or some other shit like that... this way, with Jacobs and Sylvia duking it out in a crowded bar, you can say that a WWE guy kicked the shit out of a UFC guy. Right? Sounds off in the comments, unless you Theresa, in which case go die somewhere.

I Just Pooped My Pants



Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Natasha Richardson has died.


News broke just a short bit ago. Sad news. My condolences to Sir Neeson and the family of Natasha Richardson. It's always tragic when a celebrity dies, but so much worse when it's one so beautiful.

The wife of "Schindler's List" actor Liam Neeson and the daughter of actress Vanessa Redgrave and the late film director Tony Richardson died at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York. The cause of death was not announced, but she had been hospitalized after suffering a devastating brain injury while skiing Monday.

"Liam Neeson, his sons and the entire family are shocked and devastated by the tragic death of their beloved Natasha," said a statement released by publicist Alan Nierob. "They are profoundly grateful for the support, love and prayers of everyone, and ask for privacy during this very difficult time."



Todays Only Post


Well Devon is busy having Nooners with guys. (Seriously, he posted it on Twitter). And the other writers here are lazy sons of bitches. I am on my own. AS USUAL.

So this is todays only post. Why? Well nothing interesting is really happening. No new kick ass movie trailers. No awesome movie announcements. I don't know who Natasha Richardson is but I know Liam Neeson is fuckin awesome so I guess I could say, sorry to see your wife died Liam now you should sue the shitty ski school she was being instructed by for not making her wear a helmet.

I just ate a fruit cup of pineapple it was pretty damn good.

I am currently watching Summerslam 1989.

WresltingClassics.com nerds are even more pathetic than I originally thought. See I posted a link to devonlohan.com on their shitty site. I was then banned and every post of mine was taken down. Those douche bags said YOUR SITE BLOWS IM NOT GOING THERE. And then we find out that they are in fact coming here. But on top of that, even after my links to the site were removed, they are STILL coming here, and coming back for 2nd and 3rd helpings. Which means they even SAVED devonlohan.com to their favorites to remember to come back here time and time again. That's right. Even though I was banned from their message board, they still can't get enough of me and are following me here to see if I wrote more. Sorry ladies but this is it for today.

But how about this? How about tomorrow things get back on track? We will have to see I suppose.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

WrestlingClassics.com is full of nerds.

Ever come across a group of people on the internet that are just useless in the world? That work at Burger King and hang out at the gas station at night?

That is what internet wrestling fans are. They are a strange breed of people. See they take wrestling VERY seriously. They talk about anything and everything related to wrestling. They love that shit. They are to wrestling what the Warcraft nerds are to, well Warcraft. They make movies with their wrestling action figures. They also have E FEDS, which one of our very own writers here on this site actually is involved in. I won't name names but his name starts with a D and ends with an Evon.

E Feds is those role playing bullshit games that are all over the internet. They fuckin LOOOVE to pretend to be wrestlers and type up huge promos and go on and on.

Now, to be honest, I am too a wrestling fan. Have been for many years. But I don't take it anywhere close to the extreme as these guys. I don't make the movies with my action figures anymore. I damn sure don't go near the E Fed balogna.

So what is the point of this? Well just to point out that Warcraft nerds may be losers, but these guys are pretty close to it. They have fat girlfriends. Work fast food or Wal Mart. Wear black shirts all the time. Listen to ICP and Slipknot. And think CM Punk is the fuckin tits. In other words....

The posters over on WrestlingClassics.com are people with no future in their lives. Nothing will happen to them in life that will make any impact in the world or on other people. They will do nothing but watch wrestling, talk about wrestling, and serve people their burgers.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Review: Let The Right One In

Rarely do we get good horror movies here in America. Even more rare is a good vampire movie. See the problem is, America does 2 things and 2 things only with horror movies these days...

1. Remake them.

or

2. Make some bullshit like Saw or Hostel that has no real story that you give a shit about and instead if just about how gory it can be.

So you sometime have to venture out to other countries for horror. That is what I did tonight. I have heard about this film, Let The Right One In, for many months now. And it finally came out on good ol DVD and Blu Ray here in the US. I rented the Blu Ray, sat down tonight, and watched what I can honestly say...

Is the BEST vampire movie I have ever seen. The BEST.

Seriously. I am not fuckin around. So what the hell is this movie about?

Simple really. Oskar is a 12 year old loner. He is bullied by kids at school, deals with divorced parents, and has so much rage from it all built up he does not know what to do, until he is at the playground one night and meets a young girl, Eli. Eli also has her own problems, with being a vampire.

That is where I will leave the plot outline. This movie does what most vampire movies never do. This is PERFECTION. I have never seen a vampire movie dive so deep into exactly how a vampire works and how things affect them. The god damn eye scene. Will not a scene, it is a simple shot of when Oskar and Eli are in a room and the lights are off and it is pitch dark and you slowly see Eli's eyes start to glow before Oskar flips the lights on and her eyes are cat like and then adjust right away back to normal due to the lights now being on. So fucking awesome. That scene is the first scene in a movie in a looong time that I rewound and had to watch again.

The direction, the acting, the look and feel of everything in this movie is perfect. Now I have seen Best Picture winner Slumdog Millionaire. This movie is BETTER. Way better. Sadly the country this movie is from did not put it up for any awards, so it missed out on winning Best Foriegn Film.

Like I said though, this is a film from another country, so you will have to deal with the English dub. Sadly, guess what.... AMERICA IS REMAKING THIS MOVIE. Which I promise will be fucked up and turned PG-13 and into a giant pile of ass. So just watch the REAL version. Trust me.

10/10

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

1 Down, Too Many More To Go. Tapout Co-Founder Charles Lewis Jr. Dies.

So, remember in Lost Boys, when Grandpa killed the head vampire, and Keifer turned to a human again, and Michael was saved? Well maybe this is it. Maybe all douche bag Tapout homos will turn back into just, homos?

Charles Lewis Jr. Or "Mask" as he used to go by... was killed when he was racing his ferrari around trying to show off to some girl he had with him who is now dying in the hospital. He was racing a porche at 1:00am last night. So yeah he's dead now. But what is even worse is this douche bag died from being a douche bag. Yeah. See people talk shit on Nascar all the time but at least what they do is legal and not a form of "douchery". Sorry but street racing is pretty much as gay as it gets. I'd rather go hang out at the mall with emo kids.

A memorial service for this guy is gonna be held where guys will gather all wearing TapouT shirts, drinking rockstar energy drinks, listening to Avenged Sevenfold, and acting like hard asses and driving trucks that are lifted 100 feet high with the balls hanging off the bumper, thus eliminating the purpose of having a truck. You know what I find funny about those douche bags with the balls on the truck? The balls on it are pretty small comparied to the size of the truck, so those are actually pretty small balls, are they admitting to something?

Anywho, the Memorial Service will be held at the No Fear store in Orange County, CA.


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

EXCLUSIVE: Rihanna And Chris Brown Duet Leaked!!

It was announced that Rihanna will be recording a duet with Chris Brown but the real news is that it has already been completed and the video has been released! And we are the first site to bring it to you!!

Click here to listen to the new single by Chris Brown featuring Rihanna!


Monday, March 9, 2009

Britney Spears: My PUSSY is hanging out!

Here's the vid!



To check Britney out live and see if it all hangs out again, this time in person, be sure to buy tickets to the Circus Starring Britney Spears.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Review: Watchmen

Boring.

4/10

Friday, March 6, 2009

Review: Legends Of Wrestlemania

I have been a die hard dedicated wrestling fan since around 1990. Before that I was a casual fan, catching it on TV whenever I could. I have remained a huge fan to this day. And back then I played every WWF game I could get my hands on. My first one being WWF Wrestlemania Challenge on the NES. Since that game I have bought every WWF game that has come out.

Lately, it has been Smackdown Vs. Raw games every year. And I started to wonder if I would ever see a game dedicated to those legends I watched as a kid. Well I got my wish, and Legends Of Wrestlemania was announced by the makers of the Smackdown games. The countdown began, and last night, it reached 0....

Which sadly... is what this fucking game is.

For some, insane idiotic reason, THQ and Yukes, took what was working, and ass raped it. See the graphics are AWESOME. The music rules. The look of the game is great. But then you actually PLAY the game.... See they decided to just drop the ENTIRE control scheme from the past few Smackdown games and come up with something new. They wanted this to instead play like an arcade game, instead of the simulation that we are already used to. Well guess what, go find me mother fuckers that still go to the arcade. NO ONE DOES. Why? Because arcades fucking SUCK now.

You know the buttons on top of your controllers? Like on the Playstation you got, R1, R2, L1, L2? Yeah, those are worthless now. No seriously, in the tutorial for this game, there is nothing those buttons are used for. The game is BUTTON MASHING. Seriously, when the hint pop ups during the match, it basically tells you to just mash fucking buttons. Yeah that's fun. Just mash some god damn buttons, no skill really involved in this at all. Oh yeah and now there is a BLOCK feature. Yeah, BLOCK. Not reversal. If you're thinking, what does he mean, BLOCK? Like in Mortal Kombat when they would just sit there and hold down block and sit in the corner like a fag? YES, THAT IS WHAT I MEAN. I mean SOMETHING, THAT NEVER EVER HAPPENS IN WRESTLING, IS IN THE GAME. You sit there, hold down triangle, and just block. Can you imagine Wrestlemania 15 if The Rock just sat there with his hands up and held his hands in front of his face and that blocked everything Austin did to him?

Press square to punch, press a direction and hold down square to punch HARDER? There are so many crazy insane button combinations to do in this game that it will be impossible for anyone to just pick up this game and start playing. I mean the Smackdown games were a LITTLE confusing at first, but nothing like this. Smackdown you can at least get a friend over and they can pick up and start playing and halfway into the match they got it down. With this game? Fuck that, half way through the match I was ready to just throw the controller on the ground and use my toes cause it would do just as much good. There is no point to anything in this game. MASH BUTTONS. That is it. There is constantly hint pop ups going up on the screen that instead of watching and playing the match, you're always looking around for the next hint so you can figure out what the fuck to do. Gone is any type of real timing and skill that the old games took for you to win. This is button mashing then just pin the guy. I played about 4 or 5 matches, I won a couple, lost a couple, but none of the matches actually lasted any longer than 2 minutes.

This game is the biggest dissapointment in the history of my video gaming life. So much hype and build up for an awesome game to come out only to be ruined by its pointless and assanine control layout. No wonder THQ is going out of business. Everyone over there has their heads up their ass.

4/10

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Review: I Love You, Man

Ever since I saw Halloween 6, I have been a huge Paul Rudd fan. Where Rudd went, so did my money. I have followed him through the years, good times and bad, all through Friends and beyond. Lately he has been in nothing but smash comedies. And I am a happy lil camper.

Paul Rudd plays Pete, a guy that is about to get hitched when he realizes, he has no male friends. Never really has. So he seeks out to see about finding one to be his best man at his wedding. Enter Jason Segel of Forgetting Sarah Marshall, or to most, Nick from Freaks and Geeks. One thing Freaks fans will love and notice is that Jasons character Sydney in this movie, is a huge Rush fan. It made me smile inside.

Anywho, as most probably guess, they meet up, hang out, and hijinks and hilarity ensue. It is kinda hard to review without giving too much of the good stuff away. So I will change this from a review to a recommendation of sorts. Sure whatever.

If you are a fan of any of these type of movies, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Knocked Up, Anchorman, and so on. Then you will be pleased with this movie. It is better than Sarah Marshall in my book. Rudd and Segel are phenomenal. This will easily be in my top 10 of the year come this December. Simple as that. Go see this fuckin movie. It comes out March 20th.

9/10

Public Enemies Trailer Fucking Rules

Johnny Depp + Christian Bale + Michael Mann = O M F G

Yeah. Michael Mann is a bad ass. Here is the trailer for his gangster John Dillinger movie that looks like it is going to be all the awesome I expected it to be even before I watched the trailer.



If Taylor Swift Had A Retarded Baby, It Would Still Be Hot.

Seriously.

Taylor Swift is so fucking hot it should be illegal. No joke. People could be killed. Shes so hot that if I was driving and saw her on the corner I would totally lose all motor skills and run a red light and run over some fucking old lady in the crosswalk and kill her all thanks to Taylor Swift being so hot.

Anyways, all Im saying is, Taylor Swift is fucking hot.


The Top 5 Most Annoyingly Idiotic People On The Planet

I took a long time to think about this, and decide. Out of all the groups of people on the planet, who are the most annoying? Lets take a look at the series of people, before finally unveiling the most retarded annoying idiotic faggots on the planet.

5. First, Emo Kids.
See, Emo Kids aren't really annoying. Just lame. But I couldn't name them the MOST annoying people because emo is a fad that will soon go away. Plus every now and then I see a really hot emo girl.

4. Potty Pals.
I just made this up, seriously. What is a potty pal? Well ever been in the bathroom, taking a leak, and in walks two guys that are talking REALLY fucking loud? Even though theyre about 2 feet away from each other. I don't know about you guys but there is something about having my dick out that makes me not want to speak to other dudes. These guys annoy me, mainly just because I hate loud people.

3. Broskis
Holy cow. These guys that have 16 layers of fake tan spray on and the gallon of gel in their hair.

2. Bro Dudes.
Those guys that wear the hats to the side just a tad. And are either always wearing Tapout shirts, yet they don't know how to really fight. Or they always got the popped collar shirts. And they usually take steroids in high school to look big. Ugh. These guys come in a REAL close 2nd place.

And finally... the NUMBER 1, MOST ANNOYINGLY IDIOTIC GROUP OF PEOPLE ON THE PLANET ARE..........................................................

1. Juggalos

Holy sheep shit. These are the most pathetic people there could possibly be. See with emo kids, they will grow out of it. Bro Dudes and Guidos, will still be douche bags but at least they might do something with their lives. Potty Pals can be any number of people that might already have jobs and careers and such. But Juggalos? No hope. None. They will work fast food, or at a video store, FOREVER. They will never have a career, or any type of job that pays over 8 bucks an hour. They will never own a house, and never buy a new car. They have no future. On top of that, they listen to the WORST BAND OF ALL TIME. And worship them at that. This is what makes Juggalos, the Most Annoyingly Idiotic Group Of People On The Planet. For further proof, google search Juggalo Funeral.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Super Dave Returns On Spike TV!!!!


OH.

HELL.

YES!!!!!!!!!!!

I used to watch Super Dave all the damn time as a kid with my parents. For those unaware, Super Dave was a spoof daredevil who had a show that centered around him preparing a huge stunt which would always go horribly wrong. The one I remember most is him playing a piano on top of a motorhome only to have the motorhome drive under a low bridge, smashing the piano and "Super Dave" into the side of the bridge. Of course it was all for comedy with "Super Dave" being a dummy.

Anyways, Super Dave will return to Spike TV with 4 episodes this summer.