Phoenix Suns vs San Antonio Spurs. Thanks Magic

I have been a DIE HARD Phoenix Suns fan since I was a wee little lad. atleast 20 years now. And this year, finally, after all the years of waiting and hoping, we are the best we have been, and have the best chance to FINALLY win a damn championship!!!

But, there is a problem, a pain in my game, a thorn in my side...

The Spurs.

The Spurs own our asses. They eliminate us from the playoffs all the time. They kick our asses, and as of right now, theyre up 1 - 0 in the series. And things are not looking good.

Many believe, the winner of this series will win the NBA Title, no other team in the league that is still in the playoffs can touch the Suns or the Spurs. So some can say that this is the REAL NBA Finals going on right now.

Game 1 was brutal, neither team lead by anymore than 6 the entire time. And right at the end, Suns down by 2 with a little over a minute to go, star player Steve Nash cuts his damn nose open! And cant return to the game in time!

Thanks Magic Johnson, ruin it for everyone. Magic just had to go get HIV and make the NBA change the rules that if a player is bleeding a bit, theyre not allowed on the court. If no rule existed, the Suns would have had a better chance at being the ones up 1 - 0. Not down.

So tonight is Game 2. If the Suns win this, there is still a chance, if they lose. This series is over, because there is no way my Suns can come back from being down 2 - 0 against the Spurs, any other team yeah, but the Spurs? Im scared. =(

First off...

<~~~FUCK THIS GUY

This is the most idiotic piece of shit hermaphrodite idiot that has EVER been on TV. This is simply the most gay shit I've ever seen on fuckin TV. Every time I'm watching wrestling, I have to sit through this faggot ass doing his gay little dance. I hope he chokes on his berries and cream and dies. He obviously gets so aroused at the thought of berries and cream Starburst, that he undoubtedly goes home and shoves them up his ass for pleasure. Yes, that's right, this little troll dwarf faggot has sex with his starburst and loves berries and cream up his ass. If they wanted a REAL commercial, they should've hired the Iron Sheik to run in, slap the camel clutch on this bitch, fuck his ass n make him humble! And now, a lovely piece from the berries and cream fags legion of fans........

and oh yeah, FUCK THAT PIECE OF SHIT. The End.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Iron Sheik, the Dream Match Goes Down!

Well, until a couple of days ago, I never looked at the Ultimate Warrior vs. the Iron Sheik as much of a dream match, but to my surprise, this one was actually quite interesting, and sadly, it provided more entertainment than 3/4 of WWE TV. Goes to show that 2 legends, in any given environment, can give us a show that will grab our attention no matter the circumstance, as where WWE puts on the same boring crap with the same guys they shove down our throats on a weekly basis. This showdown took place at a convention that also featured autographs from Hulk Hogan, and Bruno Sammartino among others. Too bad we didn't get a Hulkamania run in on this little confrontation, that could've been classic. Well the video is here, and we pick up right after apparently the Iron Shiek attempted to shake the Ultimate Warriors hand, and Warrior turned him down, calling him a hypocrite for going around saying that Warrior was on drugs, and that Warrior was a lesbian. Would have been interesting to see who would have whooped who's ass in this situation, as Sheik in his glory days would've broken warriors leg in 9 places, but being Sheik is in his 70's, and Warrior still looks to be in pretty good shape, would have been interesting...oh well, at least some moron got bitch slapped! On to the footage.........

Devon's Spidey 3 Review!...sort of.

Originally Tony and I were expected to maybe have contrasting points of view about Spiderman 3, but in the end, we ended up having basically the same opinions. Which might explain why we're as good of friends as we are...so rather than repeat most of the same things he had to say, I'm going to do my own spin on a Spiderman 3 review...

First and foremost, the thing I took from Spidey 3 more than anything else...

Bryce Dallas Howard is WAY hotter as a blond. Damn! The ill-fated Gwen Stacey outshines the droll Mary Jane Watson in this movie, in every way imaginable. Fans of the classic comic already know Gwen's unfortunate outcome, and if they go through with making more of these franchise blockbusters, I'm sure we'll see it take place in one way or another. In this movie, Gwen Stacey, portrayed by Bryce Dallas Howard, is the alternate source of female attention for Peter Parker, once he's cast out by Mary Jane. It's during this part of the film that we're treated to a new Peter Parker. A Peter Parker most of us aren't used to seeing....Peter Parker meets Queer Eye for the Straight Guy! Peter, under the spell of the black symbiote costume, finds himself attracting women left and right, and it's during this scene that we see him undergo a transformation from nerdy shy guy, to suave and sophisticated hip cat. His fashion switch looks like something only Carson Kressley (pictured right) could dream up. Suddenly we find Peter escorting the beautiful Miss Stacey to aswank jazz club, complete with singing waitresses...enter Mary Jane. What ensues next, is the closest thing you'll ever find to ridiculous in this trio of movies, but if you're a fan of Sam Raimi, it's something you should come to expect. People not familiar with Sam's work, are most likely going to bawk at the scene, but regardless of how cheesy it is or not, it still serves its purpose. All of this however, leads me to my only real gripe for the movie.


Peter's hair.


I'm not sure if it was part of Raimi's vision, or something the costume designers thought up, but the blatant use of Tobey Maguire's bangs, in combination with black eye liner, and what I assume was black Manic Panic hair dye, we were forced to bare witness to....EMO SPIDERMAN. Good lord... It's not just that, there's even a clip where Parker stops in front of his mirror, and pulls the bangs down over his eyes. The sheer fact that Parker would go out of his way to pull his bangs down, makes me question the sexuality of the symbiote. Suddenly, I'm staring at the screen, not sure if I'm watching Heroes, sitting at a Bright Eyes concert, or reviewing a DVD copy of Little Nicky. Either way, this whole "emo" Parker thing was - for me - the worst part of the movie.


Did I mention how hot Bryce Dallas Howard was?

Random Villains Spiderman 3 Review...

Many that know me, know my love for Spiderman. Ever since I was a little kid, I was a hardcore spidey fan. From the comics, to toys, to cartoons, to the weird Live Action show. I loved it all.

On top of that, I am a HUGE Sam Raimi fan. Many believe Tarantino and Kevin Smith were the directors whose movies I saw that made me want to be a film maker. Which is partly true, Pulp Fiction and Clerks were the movie I saw that made me wanna get serious about film making. But The Evil Dead is the movie I saw when I was a little kid that made me call my friends over and steal my parents VHS video camera and hit the backyard to make weird movies. Sam Raimi + Spiderman = GREATNESS for me.

The first Spiderman movie gave me chills and goosebumps, it was the best movie going experience of my life. Spiderman 2 was even better.

What I really love in the Spiderman world is Venom. So when it was announced the Venom was 100% in Spiderman 3, I was ready. Maybe a little, too, ready.

I hate reading reviews before I see movies, it makes me a lil jaded and tarnishes the movie going experience, but with this being Spiderman, I needed a little taste of what others were seeing, and sadly, it was no good. Most people I read reviews of hated it, a few thought it was GOOD, but not great, and a couple say its the best of the three. As for me? Im on the "it was GOOD, but not great" side.

GRIPES:
Too long, if they shaved a bit off of it, it would have been alot better. More on that in a bit.

CORNYNESS:
I know, Sam Raimi is corny, loves his jokes since he is a huge Stooges fan. And its a comic book movie, so it is bound to be a bit corny. But Spiderman 3 gets a little TOO corny sometimes. Mainly the Peter Parker Jazz dance bit, which is what could have been taken out to make it less corny, even though what happens at the end of that scene is shocking and very important. And the, Peter Parker buying a new suit dancing down the street bit was a lil too much, even though it was pretty damn funny.



GRIPES ON OTHER REVIEWS:
People are reading a little too much into this movie though. Slight spoilers lie ahead....

Almost every review I see bitches about how every character cries in this movie. Well yes they do, but fuck! This is one emotional movie. Every character goes through some serious emotions, you would cry too asshole.

Also, people bitching about Kirsten Dunst singing in the movie, saying its bad and stupid. Well, no shit, its supposed to be bad and stupid, why do you think shes fired for it in the movie and ends up singing at some shitty hole in the wall Jazz bar? It fit into the story.



MORE VENOM:
Come on, the main reason people got jazzed for this, is Venom. Venom in a Spidey movie is like getting Gambit in an X Men movie. Greatness. Venom only pops up and gets into action in the last 20 minutes or so of the movie. I know they have parts 4, 5, and 6 planned, so hopefully we will see Venom in all his glory in those movies.

Closing comments. I really dug this movie, the end fight scene was awesome, what I really love about the Spiderman movies and Sam Raimi in charge is it makes Spiderman suffer, he gets his ass KICKED in these movies but always makes it out. Sam Raimis saying is "you must first taste blood to be a true hero" unlike 90% of action movies out these days where the hero can withstand anything (The Marine) Onto another thing, people bitching about there being too many characters. Good! It kept the movie going strong, not once did this movie slow down at all. It started off great and kept me entertained for the 2 hours and 20 minutes I was in my seat. Something very few movies that are longer than 2 hours can do. So where do I stand? I say it is better than the first movie, mainly for Venom. But falls short of being better than the 2nd Spiderman movie, which to me is the best comic book flick out there. Now dont get me wrong, Spiderman 1 is an awesome flick, all 3 of them are. The ONLY reason Spiderman 3 doesnt score perfectly with me, is because it could have been a tad bit shorter, that is all. Everything else is awesome, Thomas Hayden Church kicks ass as Sandman, Ive been a huge fan of his since Wings, Bryce Howard works as Gwen Stacy for me, and J. Jonah Jameson is awesome as always. Bruce Campbell has his best cameo in this movie. Hopefully Sam Raimi and everyone will be back for part 4. I will be there opening night.

Spiderman: 9 out of 10
Spiderman 2: 10 out of 10
Spiderman 3: 9 1/2 out of 10