HO, LY, FUCK, ING, SHIT.
I have not felt, the way I felt watching that movie, since I was about 10 years old. When it was first announced that Michael Bay would be making a Transformers movie. I was crushed. I fuckin LOVED my Transformers when I was a kid. Transformers, He Man, Voltron, and Thundercats were fucking IT for me. But then along with Bay helming, I heard news that another man would be very deeply involved with the making of it... Spielberg. Thank god. I rested easy, and prepared.
Then came the first teaser for it, and it had me geeking out. And then the waiting game, even longer, until this day, 20 years in the making. People out there are complaining about OH THERE WAS TOO MANY HUMAN CHARACTERS. Yeah well, there was human characters in the cartoon as well. And honestly, who the hell was really paying that much attention to the humans in this movie anyways?
This review is going to be all over the place, because I literally got out of the theater, got home, and sat down to write this bad boy. Because if you are a Transformers fan, you are going to lose your ever lovin mind over this movie. I have not felt like a 10 year old kid in fucking awe and amazed at what I was watching. Optimus Primes arrival made the entire theater geek out, the transformation sound, seeing the transformers move, talk, just like in the cartoons. And I waited even longer, see even though the Decepticons are the bad guys, my favorite character of them all is Starscream, and holy shit I was not let down at all. The human characters work, the transformers are fucking PERFECT. And holy crap the special effects are amazed, not once did I feel like I was watching computer animated robots, they looked, and seemed real in every single way. The cartoon I loved and cherished as a kid was brought to life in front of my eyes. It was like christmas morning, when I was a little kid, and opened up and saw my Optimus Prime toy there waiting for me in a present. This movie made me so excited, and so happy, and so fuckin relieved that it seems like the only thing I can do to really express my happiness is to throw shit around my apartment and scream out my window AUTOBOTS, LETS ROLL OUT! Holy crap, with Prime says those words in the movie, chills baby, fuckin chills.
Michael Bay, you did good kid, ya did good. I am sorry I ever doubted you. But you better kiss the holy ground that Spielberg walks on, because if he wasn't there to keep you tamed and show you how its done, I fear what might have happened. But it didn't. Ladies, Gentlemen, Newton. Transformers is a fantastic ride at the movies. Go and see it now.
P.S. Sorry this review is pretty much just a geek having an orgasm all over the place, I just do not know how to put into words the complete and utter awesomeness that I just saw. I am also eager to hear Newtons thoughts on the movie.