Sunday, May 3, 2009

Breaking News: Aguilera Hooks Up with Lohan...or Something Like That

As much as I'd like to make my DevonLohan.com debut by breaking a huge story on the lesbian sex tape featuring the two vixens pictured on the right, the headline is merely an eye catching headline to announce DevonLohan.com's newest writer, which would be myself, "Johnny Aguilera" (Aguilera hooks up with Lohan, now you get it.) A brief history...I've been in negotiations to come to this site for months, but held off until it felt right. I have a history writing for various sites, many considered "mainstream," although some are run more like high school proms, but I won't get into those too much, as I"m leaving the baggage behind, and starting fresh as I join the team that will bring this site up a few levels. Now anyone that knows about these type of sites, you'd probably wonder "why would someone from a mainstream site join a seemingly low budget site that doesn't have much presence on the web. The answer is simple, I want a challenge. I've worked and made money with some sites, but it's all pretty cut and dry, not much accomplishment to be had. Those sites are already big, you just do what you're told, and that's it. When you start fresh, you get to be a part of building something and watching it succeed, which is something I've thought about for years. This oddly named site caught my eye while surfing Digg headlines months back, and I read a few posts, which subjects were all over the place, from movie news to some 1 line posts to some crazy rants on stuff you don't see elsewhere. No rhyme or reason here, no 1 subject the site was about, but maybe that's the approach that's sometimes needed. Just a site you go to that's a little bit of everything, and always something you wouldn't expect. So here I am. As I said, I'm leaving my past work behind and starting as a rookie. Since assuming a famous last name is the norm around here, Johnny Aguilera is born, and ready to help this site deliver. No holds barred, edgy, maybe some straight talk and everyday thoughts. Who knows. I have a feeling some of my taste will clash with the writers here, but I've been told that that's OK. And I'm not afraid to hype something that's unpopular if I like it, or tell you that the popular thing sucks in my opinion, so this should be a very interesting ride. Movies, movies, celebrities, opinions, news, it all sounds good to me, so enough talking, Johnny Aguilera is here, and it's time to deliver.

11 comments:

  1. You queens have some faggy names. Devon Lohan? Faggy Aguilera? WTF

    Do you have Perez Hiltons sweaty nutsack in your mouth?

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  2. .........ok. Devon Lohan had a point. I don't know who Johnny Aguilera is or why he is infringing on my gimmick.

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  3. And now that I've read the post I'm even more irritated. Having a "famous last name" isn't the norm. It's MY deal.

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  4. I have no idea who in the blue fuck Johnny Aguilera is but all I gotta say is a reply to this comment...

    "I don't know who Johnny Aguilera is or why he is infringing on my gimmick."

    Devon, you might not recall but, D$ and I are the ones that came up with the name Devon Lohan. So it's not really YOUR deal, it's not really ANYones deal. If the dude wants to use another gimmick name why not? More writers here the better I say, doesn't matter what name they use.

    Besides, name one writer outside of you, me, D$, and GC that have actually came here and stayed. I doubt we even see more than 4 blogs from Johnny Aguilera.

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  5. I don't recall. I remember D and I having a conversation along the lines of creating the gimmick ala Perez Hilton, and I came up with Devon Lohan.

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  6. Oh and Johnny I appreciate you coming down from your higher level blogs to give us some help on our poor old lowly blog.

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  7. Actually, as the story goes, myself and G.C. were talking about how no one was happy with "Ultra Entertainment," and GC made an off hand remark about we should just call it "DevonLohan.com," and everyone liked it, hence it was born. The SITE was a knock on the Perez Hilton name, as I've said before, no one is going to Hollywood premiers and award shows AS Devon Lohan, it's just the name of the site. It was said all along that we could come up with some gay name, and make a site with pink colors, and make it a winner just like Perez did, and that's all there is to it.

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  8. I guess, the mark of an accomplished, mainstream writer, is mastering run on sentences, with lots, and lots, of commas, even when none, are needed.

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  9. Why do you keep trying to lump me in with you on this? I don't need to be consulted on this shit cause I don't really care if another writer comes on board or not. 50 new writers could appear, I don't give a shit. The more content the better.

    And I like how you comment on a run on sentence after someone else pointed it out. Not before. This is DevonLohan.com, not English class.

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  10. Marcus C. JacksonMay 5, 2009 at 7:05 PM

    I don't understand why we need all these homosexual writers here. While Random Villain is an Obama lover and terrorist sympathizer, he does have some really good points. This should be a blog by manly men about manly man topics. The homosexual agenda is the most dangerous threat to our civilization and the storm clouds are coming. These queers who wear pink and fornicate with lady-boys should not be welcome.

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  11. In closing I must side with Devon a bit...

    Because if another new writer comes along, and they use the name Random Hero. I will be so pissed. I will sue this site. Seriously. Slander. And Gimmick Infringement. No one else can be Random anything. Only me cause, that's part of what makes me dynamic.

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